Before I Slip Away

Friends, Romans, countrymen:

I've just shot myself. I'm sick of running. Sick of hiding. Sick of living like this, being hunted down like an animal, not even having enough time to update this damn blog. By the time you read this, I'll certainly be dead.

But worry not: You'll hear from me soon.

Regards,
Dante

A Brief Moment of Relaxation

Ever met someone from the blogosphere in real life outside of a dangerous situation?

In a strange twist of fate I ended up on Omega's doorstep. Yep. That Omega. The one who writes the encyclopedia about Slender Man. Prior to what I would have thought, he does not look like a drug dealer, although when I asked him if he deals meth he began acting sketchy.

Oh well. If he wants to deal meth, that is his business.

He ended up letting me stay with him for a day, which was pretty nice, for a drug dealer. We ended up having a good-old Texas-style BBQ. You wouldn't expect it, but Omega's pretty good at cooking. Pork sandwiches, ribs, beans, and all.

...When did I say I keep kosher? Because if I did, I was totally lying. I'm a Texan, dammit.

It was really nice, taking a break from the Running and hiding and worrying about proxies like Morningstar and Ferus. It was just us, eating BBQ and playing video games and laughing like the Slender Man never existed and like we weren't doomed to die.

It was nice, taking a breather. I wish things like this happened more often.

But I'm back on the road again, trying my best to avoid proxy creeps like certain ones who follow this blog. I envy Henry.

He managed to get away.

Convictions Are More Dangerous Foes

"Why do they wear those masks? Maybe there's a part of them that remembers how they used to be, how they used to look. And they're ashamed." -Atlas, Bioshock


Masks always looked strange to me. I remember reading how Jekyll recommended that runners wear masks, how Maduin wears that weird rabbit mask... The rabbit mask reminds me of Sander Cohen.

Sometimes I wonder how we can trust these people when they hide behind masks. But then again, who else can we trust?

Human nature is a funny thing.

Regards,
Dante


P.S. Dallas' heat index is terrible, about as terrible as the city. I'd avoid going there anytime soon, runners who happen to be in Texas.

Caught in a Landslide

I'm... I'm still alive. I don't know how or anything but I'm still alive and I guess if there's one thing I've done this entire fucking time it's survive.

I'm leaving Corpus Christi. Not telling you all where I'm going; it's too risky and I put myself and more importantly other people in danger the last time I said where I was going... Like all those people except I don't want to think about that right now. So I'm taking Glass' advice and getting the fuck out of here.

I might as well tell you guys what hapepned because it's scaring the fucking shit out of me and who knows,, maybe someone can help.

The power went out, like I said, but it shoudln't have been that dark... Not so early in the evening. I grabbed a flashlight because I figured if I'm going to die I might as well know just what killed me- If it was a proxy who just cut the wires in the hotel, or if it was the Slender Man himself. I felt a migraine coming on and I just wanted to lie down and hide under the covers and sleep, but that wasn't an option. I wasn't gonna die a coward. Not this time.

I grabbed the knife I keep on my desk since I lost my gun and wandered out into the hallway. The power was out in there, too. I continued walking and went down the stairs, figuring that if it was a coincidence which of course it probably wasn't I might as well try to fix what had happened.

As I wlaked down the stairs I realized that the staircase wasn't this long. It's not exactly a big building... Of course,like any normal person, I kind of freaked out, but continued walking. I wasn't... I wasn't gonna die a coward.

So I kept walking, like any crazy person would.

...Finally, I got sick of walking. It was taking too long and this was horrible and I could tell he was just messing with me and that if he had a mouth he'd be grinning like a cheshire cat. So I did the logical thing: I jumped off the stairs.

Yes. I hopped over the railing. I figured I'm going to die anyway, so I might as well.

It wasn't too far down, actually, although I did knock the wind out of myself for a second. That was... Unpleasant, the feeling of not being able to breathe. I crawled to my knees and realized I'd broken my flashlight during the fall. I lost my knife somewhere during the fall, too...

The lights flickered on. He was standing there, staring at me with his blank no-face and I could only stare back. I felt sick and drawn towards him and I don't even know but I threw up and those tentacles came out and the room went dark again.

That's all I remember. I think I passed out... I dunno. I woke up in my room, as though I'd been taking a nap or something. My knife was back on my desk where I'd left it, as well as my flashlight which happened to work. At first I thought I'd been dreaming the entire time except then I logged on to blogger and saw that I really had posted.

This is... Disconcerting. I don't understand any of it. Was it reality, or was it just a dream? I hope it was the latter...

Regards,
Dante

P.S. Ferus: Fuck you.

Halfway There

Sorry I haven't posted in a while. I got a virus on my computer, which deleted system32. Yep. So I had to go and fix that by myself because I've been paranoid of leaving my room ever since Morningstar came here...

I can see how a virus could get past my antivirus because that happens quite frequently, but I do regular Process Explorer checks to see if there's anything sketchy on my computer. Hmm... I don't like it, anyway. It doesn't mean that Murphy and Morgan are behind it, but random virus attacks in the middle of a slenderstalking are weird.

Anyway, I've mostly been holed up in here, trying to avoid the outside world. I wonder if I'm going crazy.

...shit. The power just went out. If I don't respond within a week, well.

Regards,
Dante

Wedding Bells on an April Morn

I... I don't understand it. Is there something wrong with me? Is there something that causes me to be so messed up and hurt and depressed and suicidal whenever proxies or Slender Man do something drastic? How am I the only one to suffer loved ones dying, to carry the burden of the murder of innocents?

The Wedding, but it's not just the Wedding. It's everything. I read all these fucking blogs and posts about how the runner got away perfectly unharmed and how they suffered few casualties and how they're perfectly fine and ready to continue fighting the good fight... And I wonder how they can do that. Are they lucky? It seems that way.

I would kill to be that lucky. And acknowledging that makes it all worse.

It's just... Why should they be able to get away perfectly fine and sane and unharmed and alright and I can't? Is there something wrong with me? Am I doing something wrong? Am I just that pathetic of a person that I can barely survive as a runner? It seems to be so... I just wish I knew how to survive.

I was afraid of Morningstar. I... I thought everyone else was too, when they actually met him with his personal army with him. I know people say it's okay to be scared and normal and I shouldn't be ashamed, but... If no one else is as afraid as me, then what does that say?

You all have no idea how good you have it.

Speaking of the murder of innocents. Got a knock on the door today from the politsia. The same ones. A man and a woman. Said witnesses had seen me near the apartment building that had been... The one that Morningstar had chased me into and done that thing in. Caught their names, although in honour to the dead I'll give literary pseudonyms. Morgan and Murphy. Not quite Les Miserables, but Butcher is still a good author.

Police questioning is always fun. I just said I'd been walking to the grocery store and walked back, and I had passed by the apartment minutes before the... The massacre happened.

They're proxies. I'm sure of it. I can't prove it, but I know they are. I just know.

Regards,
Dante

I Could Not Stop For Death

All I need to do is avoid Morningstar for a few days, as he's taking a plane back soon.

I know he knows where I am (say that five times fast), as I had a little, um, run-in with him today. And his billion underlings. I'm still amazed I'm not dead, there were so many of them and they had guns and a snake (what the fuck) and oh my god I could have died in what i was planning on...

Uh, nevermind. I'll continue with the story first.

Unfortunately, being holed up in this room means that I don't have a constant supply of necessities, such as food, or feminine hygiene products (oh, you laugh now. just wait until you're reincarnated as a woman or something). I could have asked someone to get things for me... But that would mean that I'd have to trust them to not poison or drug my food and then drag me off and torture me and...

...Yeah. On with the story, Dante.

Okay. So, I was slightly paranoid at the time, if you haven't figure that out yet. No, not paranoid- It isn't paranoia if they really are out to get you. In retrospect, it would have been smarter to drive, but I was freaked out about someone cutting my brakes or putting a bomb under my car, so I decided to walk. Like the goddamn genius I am.

Bad idea.

I was halfway there when I found myself being shoved into an alleyway. One of the ones with a dead end, of course. I looked up to see who the fuck had pushed me in. A group of people. People with weapons. Scary looking people with weapons.

He knew I was unarmed, of course. Fuck, why did I post that? Oh well, it's too late now...

At first I was frozen. Yes, I was afraid. If it was just Morningstar, I wouldn't be. But... It wasn't. It was Morningstar and all his little underlings, and they had weapons and I didn't and holy shit i thought i was gonna die... Of course he taunted me, and I could just dumbly stare back.

And then he barked out his orders. To kill me, of course. And that's when I regained control.

I frantically looked around and saw that the heavens had smiled upon me for once, or at least thrown me a bone. A fire escape. I ran up it and of course they followed, but thankfully I was still ahead of them. I... I think I heard bullets being fired, but I can't be sure.

I got to the top and was certain that this was it, that I was going to die at the hands of Morningstar and was prepared to jump off the fire escape in an attempt to at least kill myself when I saw that there was a window. And it was open.

I have never before been so grateful for Corpus' weather.

I slid through the window and made sure to lock it behind me. At least then I'd know when they came in. I ran through the apartment and heard the glass shattering, but I quickly found the door to the hallway. I was on the fourth floor, and they were quickly gaining on me... This is the worst part. I feel sick typing it out.

I needed a distraction, so I made one. I screamed and shouted that there was a group of people trying to rape me. That's not the part that makes me sick.

The part that makes me sick is that I'm certain that every one of the people in that apartment building are dead. I don't know. I didn't... I didn't stick around to watch. How could I? I just sentenced plenty more people to death, and this time I don't even have the excuse of not knowing what I was doing. I knew exactly what was happening...

... And I did it anyway.

I sprinted down the stairs and got the hell out of there, trying to ignore the noises of the gunshots. I ran all the way back here.

Even if I don't have food, at least I have cheap vodka. Any guesses as to what I'll be doing tonight?

Regards,
Dante